James Hollis: Self-Worth, Patterns & the Bigger Picture

"I Wish to Be Seen, to Be Valued, to Be Someone..."

Chapter 10

OMG.

Those are the words of James Hollis.

We all carry wounds to our self-esteem.

For some, those wounds are paralyzing.

For others, they become fuel.

C.G. Jung observed that behind the wound is often the genius of the person.

Another OMG.

That genius is the gift inside us, warts and all.

We are not here to be perfect.

We are here to be ourselves.

James Hollis puts it this way:

"Some people's lives express themselves externally through the gifts of intellect, talent, or achievement of some sort or another....For most of us, however, the gift we may bring this world is found in moments of spontaneity where we add our small piece to the collective."

We are here for one reason:

To be ourselves.

Here's a true story

James Hampton was a janitor for the federal government. He swept floors and cleaned toilets. Imagine the wounds to his self-esteem.

But secretly, in his garage, using discarded tinfoil and scraps, he built a masterpiece:

"The Throne of the Third Heaven of the Nations' Millennium General Assembly."

It was never seen by anyone until after his death, and is now on display in the Smithsonian.

OMG.

CEO Reflection Audit:

What has happened that makes me do what I do?

Do I know my true calling, my gift?

What have I always wanted to do?

CEO Challenge:

Take another walk.

Just walk and listen for the gift inside you that's still waiting to be seen.

Why Does My Life Keep Working Out This Way?

Chapter 11

We all, yes, even you, do the same dumb things over and over.

I know I do.

But why?

From the moment we're born, we're fed messages about how the world works.

What's safe?

What's acceptable?

What's expected?

Those messages become scripts for our internal operating system.

And because the brain loves predictability, it runs those scripts on autopilot.

Over. And over. And over again.

So what happens?

You get feedback, and suddenly you're defensive.

There's a tough call to make, and you avoid it.

Stress builds up, and you start self-medicating with food, booze, screens, or overworking.

Sound familiar?

James Hollis writes:

"Recognizing the patterns, especially the self-destructive patterns, is the first step. Then comes taking them on, for the rest of one's life... Every day is a war between the constrictive colloquies of history and the invitation to the high seas of the soul."

Read that again.

You're not broken. You're just stuck in a system your soul is trying to outgrow.

CEO Reflection Audit:

Where do these knee-jerk reactions come from?

What truth have I refused to face about myself or my leadership?

Am I willing to suffer and face the ghosts of old adaptations?

CEO Challenge:

This is heady stuff.

Catch yourself in the moment when autopilot kicks in.

Pause. Interrupt the pattern.

Choose the high seas over the same damn harbor.

What Is the Bigger Picture?

Chapter 12

There is a larger world to which James Hollis is calling us.

And if we're being honest, it's a world that many CEOs rarely visit.

In this chapter, Hollis steps into the realm of religion and spirituality.

We're not going down that rabbit hole today.

Except to say, that the spiritual question of something larger, something beyond us, offers more mystery than certainty.

Full stop.

Hollis writes:

"What does it mean to be here? To what am I called? What values, traits, and capacities must I embody in my life? These are the kinds of questions that call us out of the trivial... and help us reframe our frustrations and disappointments and step into something larger than fitting in, being successful, being safe, and being accepted by everyone."

Hoo boy. Take a breath.

For me, it means:

The "larger life" isn't found in more accolades, more scale, or another round of funding.

It's found in showing up every day in service of what feels right, not just what's expected.

We all admire those who "dared greatly", not because they were perfect,

but because they had the courage to follow conviction over comfort.

CEO Reflection Audit:

Why am I really here?

Is there more to my life than the path I am on?

To what am I being called, but maybe avoiding?

CEO Challenge:

Yeah, it makes me more than a little uncomfortable myself. The point is not to sell the company and head off to the monastery. Rather, it is to discover how we can give more expression to that which is inside us, all the while staying, for the most part, in our lane.